So i have now been on three dates with Ed, and lastnight was my turn to pick a date ideah. And as i have missed home and English food a little this week i decided that we would go to a British Fish and chip shop in Park slope. We ate and chatted away, and then bought some English chocolate bars to take away for dessert. We then walked to the lake in prospect park, the lake looks beautiful day and night. If i ever have a bad day or want time to think i will go sit at the edge of the lake and look out into the water and let my mind get lost in thoughts. We found a romantic and peacefull spot tucked away from any other people not that there was many people in the park as it was getting late. It wasnt long before we were kissing. I am obviously attracted to Ed and things between us could have gone alot further than they did in the heat of the moment (as lets face it it's been a while). But i did not want to rush anything, so much to my bodies disgust i slowed things down. I am very carefull with who i am intimate with as many men only want one thing, and i am not one to hand it to them on a plate. I do not think for one minute that sex is all Ed wants but at the same time we have only met three times and i think things where moving a little to fast...
I also found out alot more about Ed over this date and talking on the phone the night before, he is turning out to be an interesting character, which is great as it keeps me intrigued.
So it turns out Ed has never been in love and hasn't cried in 18 years , the way he described this almost made him paint a picture of himself being heartless. But i don't think thats the case at all, when i thought deeper i thought maybe he just finds different ways of expressing himself and his emotions, and he has obviously never met the right person as far as love in concerned. As when you do fall in love you can't control it. I do wonder whither Ed had been hurt in previous relationships and now he has built up this wall that is hard to let down, however in general i find that men can detach their emotions much easier than girls. When i asked him about this he obviously was quick to jump and say "no i have not built up a wall" but i can't help but think there must be a reason behind all of this.
He also mentioned that he was in a relationship all summer and they only split up 4 weeks ago. This came as abit of a shock to me as that seems very soon to me to be moving on and looking to date someone else. By know means do i want to be a rebound for him, neither do i want to be involved with someone that has strong feelings for someone else. As that is a waste of my time and theirs. But i actually am not getting a vibe that he does still have strong feelings for this girl.
I must not let this put me off him, i will give him the benefit of the dought. But i will just be careful whilst doing so like i always am. I believe you should trust someone until they give you reason not to.
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